80 Rules That Will Change Your Life

 

1. When entrusted with a secret, keep it.   
2. Never cancel by text message.
3. Don’t knock it ‘til you try it.
4. If a street performer makes you stop walking, you owe him a buck.
5. There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs is not one of them.
6. Always use “we” when referring to your home team or your government.
7. Don't underestimate kicks in a game of footy.
8. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
9. Don’t dumb it down.
10. You only get one chance to notice a new haircut.
11. If you’re staying more than one night, unpack.
12. Never park in front of a bar.
13. Expect the seat in front of you to recline. Prepare accordingly.
14. Hold your heroes to a high standard.
15. Never lie to your doctor.
16. All guns are loaded.
17. Don’t mention sunburns. Believe me, they know.
18. The best way to show thanks is to wear it. Even if it’s only once.
19. Don’t fill up on bread, no matter how good it is.
20. A handshake beats an autograph.
21. Don’t linger in the doorway. In or out.
22. If you choose to go in drag, don’t sell yourself short.
23. Never get your haircut the day of a special event.
24. Be mindful of what comes between you and the Earth. Always buy good shoes, tires, and sheets.
25. Eat lunch with the new kids.
26. When traveling, keep your wits about you.
27. It’s never too late for an apology.
28. Don’t pose with booze.
29. If you have right of way, TAKE IT.
30. You don’t get to choose your own nickname.
31. Never push someone off a dock.
32. Under no circumstances should you ask a woman if she is pregnant.
33. It’s not enough to be proud of your ancestry, live up to it.
34. Don’t make a scene.
35. Know when to ignore the camera.
36. Never gloat.
37. Make time for your mom on your birthday, It’s her special day too.
38. When opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.
39. Sympathy is a crutch, never fake a limp.
40. Give credit. Take Blame.
41. Suck it up every now and again.
42. Never be the last one in the pool.
43. Don’t stare.
44. Address everyone that carries a firearm professionally.
45. Stand up to bullies. You’ll only have to do it once.
46. If you’ve made your point, stop talking.
47. Admit it when you’re wrong.
48. If you offer to help don’t quit until the job is done.
49. Look people in the eye when you thank them.
50. Thank the bus driver.
51. Never answer the phone at the dinner table.
52. Forgive yourself for your mistakes.
53. Know at least one good joke.
54. Don’t boo. Even the ref is somebody’s son.
55. Know how to cook one good meal.
56. Learn to drive a stick shift.
57. It’s okay to go to the movies by yourself.
58. Dance with your mother/father.
59. Don’t lose your cool. Especially at school and work.
60. Always thank the host.
61. If you don’t understand, ask before it’s too late.
62. Know the size of your boyfriend/girlfriend's clothes.
63. There is nothing wrong with a plain t-shirt.
64. Be a good listener. Don’t just take your turn to talk.
65. Keep your word.
66. Carry your mother’s bags. She carried you for 9 months.
67. Don’t be the talker in a movie.
68. The opposite sex likes people who shower.
69. You are what you do. Not what you say.
70. Learn to change a tire.
71. Be kind. Everyone has a hard fight ahead of them.
72. An hour with grandparents is time well spent. Ask for advice when you need it.
73. Don’t litter.
74. You won’t always be the strongest of fastest. But you can be the toughest.
75. Never call someone before or after 9 AM and 9PM.
76. Make the little things count.
77. You’re never too old to need your mom.
78. Your dance moves might not be the best, but I promise making a fool of yourself is more fun than sitting on the bench alone.
79. Smile at strangers.
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